Abstinence

I’ve been resenting my inability to drink like a gentleman. There’s never going to be a time when I can consume alcohol safely. The residual emotions are lingering and I feel like they’re seeping out of the cracks. Weakened fault lines causing subconscious quakes, shuddering my sense of confidence, self worth and identity. Hemingway saidContinue reading “Abstinence”

Pangs

I like to be perceived as having my shit together, however this can be problematic being an alcoholic. The veneer of normality creates a buffer zone, a no man’s land of threat, wonder and hope. In sobriety I have acquired the successes or trappings of life depending on how you see it, and yet IContinue reading “Pangs”

Dual Forces

A ferocious maniac with no sense of benevolence or empathy for others. The terror within manifests as anger erupting into uncontrollable rage and violence. Frustrated sadness of something caught in a trap. Excruciating existence alleviated by gnarled arguments won through twisted logic and delusional core beliefs of alcohol being a benign presence. A kind soothsayerContinue reading “Dual Forces”